Before mercury, my blood used to fill thermometers.

Monday, December 8, 2014

Comparing/contrasting the circumstance in which I find myself with Hannah's season 3 arc on "Girls."

  1. No one is dead.
  2. Like Hannah, I did write a book that I was urged to write by an editor.
  3. Unlike Hannah, instead of avoiding a thing that had come to represent my hopes and the foundation of my self-worth, I took the very casual proposal that was extended to me and transformed it from an enhanced, more lucid version of my season one recapping of Girls into a meticulous close reading of the show that explores how art by women is viewed and reviewed. And thank goodness! If no one had said, "You should write this book," I doubt I would have put the discipline and vigor into it that I did.
  4. Having the example of Girls on my mind, something that has been rewarding, empowering, and comforting over the past year is how possible this project was to research, organize, and write. The fact that I could complete this manuscript with a day job into which I pour a lot of resources and energy, coordinate two consistent freelance jobs, move my significant other seamlessly into my apartment, and still read Elena Ferrante's Neapolitan Novels — that has come as the greatest relief to me and a chiefly exciting facet of this venture that cannot be diminished. I did not have to cancel parts of my life to make this manuscript into exactly what I wanted it to be.
  5. Like Hannah, my publisher was not able to publish the book.
  6. Unlike Hannah, this decision was reached before I signed the contract — and for the better. I maintain nothing but good will and best wishes for Lost Angelene, and the decision not to move forward was a mutual one based on the method of production and distribution planned for the book.
  7. To clarify: I have faith that my book will find a great home, and I can encourage everyone everywhere to purchase it. I will be more than ready to advise them where to purchase it. If someone told me they bought it from a company that would prefer booksellers and publishers not to exist and endeavors to replace them, I would not be thrilled. If that company controlled the production and distribution of my book, ensuring that they profited from every sale, I would not, in good conscience, be able to recommend my own book. And I could not bear that quandary, because I wrote a spectacular book.
  8. Like Hannah, I am moved to take action immediately. My campaign of query letters begins.
  9. The people in my life have been tremendously supportive and kind and made it easy to appreciate my advantages, having this manuscript fully composed.
  10. The day after this happened, I had to manage the coverage of Peter Pan Live! at work. My fear of musical theatre is bordering on a phobia and my tolerance for fake British accents is nonexistent. But something about the blunt force of it — and Allison Williams, who was having an inspiring blast with her role as Ray from Girls disguised as Peter Pan — I did forget I was sad. I was sad. But I've got a lot of work to do now.

1 comment:

  1. It's really great to write something book length alongside other obligations. I too did this this year but poetry which is different but it was a good feeling! It's still with an editor but even if it's a no I feel good too! I know you'll find the right place for your book

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